“Let me have a sniff of your panties” Cobblers T-Shirt

Description

Details (for the fabric perverts):

• 100% cotton (because polyester makes you clammy during The Shame)

• Sport Grey: 90% cotton, 10% polyester (like your soul, mostly good)

• Ash Grey: 99% cotton, 1% disappointment

• Heather colours: a 50/50 blend of cotton and spiritual confusion

• Fabric weight: 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (just heavy enough to feel like consequences)

• Tubular fabric (like your thoughts: circular)

• Open-end yarn (whatever that means — probably sexy)

• Double-seamed for emotional reinforcement

Each shirt is printed just for you the moment you order it — like a restraining order made with love.

That’s why it might take a bit longer to arrive. We don’t bulk print because we’re not monsters. Every order reduces overproduction, landfill waste, and late-night existential crises.

Thanks for choosing unhinged, overthought, emotionally unstable fashion.

Sourced from:
Honduras, Nicaragua, Haiti, the Dominican Republic, Bangladesh, Mexico — and the inner folds of your regret.

Disclaimer:
The White variant may look slightly off-white. That’s because, like you, it has never truly been pure.
Expect dark speckles in the “Natural” colour. Life is full of stains.

This item is considered a consumer product and has been manufactured in accordance with applicable UK and EU General Product Safety Regulations.
It contains no moving parts, no sharp bits, and poses no obvious danger unless you’re into some really creative behaviour — in which case, that’s on you.

We do not recommend eating it, inserting it, or using it as a tourniquet at a dogging site. But legally speaking, yes — it’s safe for normal human wear and sorrowful existence.

For compliance questions, email gpsr@sindenventures.com or write to Unhinged Records, PO Box 7169, Poole, BH15 9EL.